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God shoots himself in Wynn Las Vegas Hotel Room - William K. Wolfrum

LAS VEGAS – The age old question – could God create a shotgun big enough to blow his own brains out? – has finally been answered. And that answer is, yes. Yes he can.

God was found dead yesterday at the Wynn Las Vegas of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

“At this point, we see nothing that suggests foul play,” said lead detective Timothy Johnson. “We found a suicide note at the scene.”

This is the second controversial incident to take place at Wynn Las Vegas. Earlier this week, heiress Paris Hilton was arrested for cocaine possession upon leaving the resort.

God, 43, has long been considered the top deity in the world, and has gone by numerous aliases in the past. Johnson said they found numerous passports in the room, including some with the names “God,” “Allah,” and “John Lennon,” amongst others.

The suicide note was acquired by the renegade Web Site WikiLeaks, which immediately published key portions of the hand-written, often meandering document.

“To Whom it may concern,” wrote God, with immaculate penmanship, “despite a divine, infinite existence, I have grown so weary of you morons that I could no longer bear the pain.”

The document went on to say that while God had been able to work through holy wars, beheadings, pedophile priests and Pat Boone, recent events had made things too difficult to handle.

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God stated that it was physicist Stephen Hawking that pushed him over the edge.

“When Hawking said I didn’t exist, I thought, ‘well, sounds about right to me.’”

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I come to believe that a major problem with God is not whether He exists but how one defines Him

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Indeed, scientists from Albert Einstein to Stephen Hawking have looked at the universe and acknowledged a being, or mind, or architect before whom the only response is awe.

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How can we understand the world in which we find ourselves? Over twenty years ago I wrote A Brief History of Time, to try to explain where the universe came from, and where it is going. But that book left some important questions unanswered. Why is there a universe--why is there something rather than nothing? Why do we exist? Why are the laws of nature what they are? Did the universe need a designer and creator?

It was Einstein’s dream to discover the grand design of the universe, a single theory that explains everything. However, physicists in Einstein’s day hadn’t made enough progress in understanding the forces of nature for that to be a realistic goal. And by the time I had begun writing A Brief History of Time, there were still several key advances that had not yet been made that would prevent us from fulfilling Einstein’s dream. But in recent years the development of M-theory, the top-down approach to cosmology, and new observations such as those made by satellites like NASA’s COBE and WMAP, have brought us closer than ever to that single theory, and to being able to answer those deepest of questions. And so Leonard Mlodinow and I set out to write a sequel to A Brief History of Time to attempt to answer the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything. The result is The Grand Design, the product of our four-year effort.

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Originally posted by Henry J:
6.4 billion years? Is that a typo?

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Actually, the ignoramus picked up the number of people in this world when he was searching the Internet.

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Originally posted by Sela Juneau:

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Originally posted by Henry J:
6.4 billion years? Is that a typo?

Henry,

Actually, the ignoramus picked up the number of people in this world when he was searching the Internet.



Sela

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Originally posted by Sela Juneau:
Ah, yes, it's amazing the thinking of men.

Calling someone an ignoramus who posts on the religious forum just to attack Christians and knows as much about the Bible as a third-grader, is not nice, I am told.

But it is okay for these same atheists to send trojan horses, viruses and spyware into my computer to suppress my posting!

Shows how shallow the minds of unbelievers think.

Sela

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But it is okay for these same atheists to send trojan horses, viruses and spyware into my computer to suppress my posting!

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And why would I want to do that?