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Pence visits conversion therapists or routine gay- preventative checkup
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Aavid
Picture of Born Again Liberal
posted
quote:
WASHINGTON—Sitting in the waiting area while ignoring the screams he heard emanating from the exam room, Vice President Mike Pence reportedly visited his conversion therapist Thursday for a routine gay-preventative checkup. “I feel completely heterosexual right now, but I still like to visit the doctor every six months or so to just to be safe,” said Pence, noting that he didn’t enjoy receiving electric shocks on his genitals while staring at photos of naked men, but it was worth it to ensure he didn’t come down with a case of full-blown gayness later on. “Maybe I’m a hypochondriac when it comes to contracting homosexuality, but I’m a busy guy and I’d rather have a spiritual intervention early on than risk missing work to recover from being attracted to men. Plus, now that it’s June it seems like everyone is gay so I need to be extra careful. I’m so lucky my insurance covers yearly gay-prevention appointments.” At press time, Pence was preparing to be lobotomized in an effort to fully immunize himself from dangerous homosexual thoughts.


https://politics.theonion.com/...gay-preve-1835480234


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    " I don't watch Fox News for the same reason I don't eat out of the toilet"
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    Posts: 29908 | Location: from my home | Mbr Since: 10-13-2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    AAA+
    Picture of True Conservative
    posted Hide Post
    Not funny Liberal BS   :bs:


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    Posts: 115284 | Location: Sunny Florida | Mbr Since: 10-06-2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    Aavid
    Picture of Born Again Liberal
    posted Hide Post
    quote:
    Originally posted by True Conservative:
    Not funny Liberal BS   :bs:


    Does your insurance cover it?


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    “ Fox News has done yo our parents what our parents thought video games would do to us.”

    "The real threat to our democracy isn't a religion and its millions of followers but the Trump administration's abuse of power and utter contempt for the truth.”

    "If there is a Muslim ban, refugees can pretend they are christians. You know, just like republicans do."

    New York Post: ‘Donald Trump Jr. is an Idiot’

    "Those that tell me not to talk politics cause I'm an uninformed celebrity voted for an uninformed celebrity for president." Alyssa Milano

    "trump appeals to the lowest common denominator" Stephen Hawking

  • "Science doesn't care what you believe"
    " I don't watch Fox News for the same reason I don't eat out of the toilet"
  •  
    Posts: 29908 | Location: from my home | Mbr Since: 10-13-2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    Enthusiast...
    Picture of That JR Thang
    posted Hide Post
    ROTF   :rotf:


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    Fence straddlers get a crotch full of splinters -- Granny
     
    Posts: 4309 | Location: Atlanta | Mbr Since: 05-01-2017Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    Zealot...
    Picture of Holy Bhagworm
    posted Hide Post
    quote:
    Originally posted by Born Again Liberal:
    quote:
    WASHINGTON—Sitting in the waiting area while ignoring the screams he heard emanating from the exam room, Vice President Mike Pence reportedly visited his conversion therapist Thursday for a routine gay-preventative checkup. “I feel completely heterosexual right now, but I still like to visit the doctor every six months or so to just to be safe,” said Pence, noting that he didn’t enjoy receiving electric shocks on his genitals while staring at photos of naked men, but it was worth it to ensure he didn’t come down with a case of full-blown gayness later on. “Maybe I’m a hypochondriac when it comes to contracting homosexuality, but I’m a busy guy and I’d rather have a spiritual intervention early on than risk missing work to recover from being attracted to men. Plus, now that it’s June it seems like everyone is gay so I need to be extra careful. I’m so lucky my insurance covers yearly gay-prevention appointments.” At press time, Pence was preparing to be lobotomized in an effort to fully immunize himself from dangerous homosexual thoughts.


    https://politics.theonion.com/...gay-preve-1835480234


    Fabulous!! I wish it were a joke or something...but these Onion reporters know everything.

    HB
     
    Posts: 22769 | Location: 1 | Mbr Since: 08-11-2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    Zealot...
    Picture of Holy Bhagworm
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    BTW, I've never seen a man who looks more homosexual than pence. And I spent many years in San Francisco and loved to visit the Castro area.

    HB
     
    Posts: 22769 | Location: 1 | Mbr Since: 08-11-2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    Aardent
    Picture of Gus Rodgers
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    Bwahaha  :bwa:


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    Posts: 30519 | Location: Dacron, Ohio | Mbr Since: 05-19-2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
    Aadmirable
    Picture of The Fox God
    posted Hide Post
    Somebody should put Pence in touch with Marcus Bachmann.


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    Donald Trump called Ted Cruz a liar.
    Cruz called Trump a liar. I believe them both.
     
    Posts: 49196 | Location: Metal Heaven | Mbr Since: 11-14-2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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